Subject: FINALLY, AN HONEST BAR MITZVAH INVITATION
Date Posted: 7/6/2009 12:44 PM ET
Member Since: 6/20/2007 Posts:
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It is with great stress, emotional and physical fatigue and incredible financial sacrifice beyond comprehension, that we invite you to join us as our wonderful son Jacob Adam is called to the Torah as a Bar Mitzvah.
Saturday, May 12th - (yes we realize its Mother's Day Weekend) Temple Israel 14 Coleytown Road Westport, Connecticut 06880
at the ungodly hour of 9:00 am even though you don't really need to be there until 10:20am to catch the real action.
If you make it through the 3 hour service, please skip the kiddush (its just cookies and cake) and join us instead for an overly large an d ostentatious Kosher (my husband's idea) evening meal, which starts at 7:00 PM, (not 8:00 PM.. or you will miss out on the 2000 canapes).
Birchwood Country Club 25 Kings Hwy S Westport, CT 06880 (which we had to join just for this event and you would not believe the initiation fees)
You will be in the presence of lots of boisterous and expensive entertainment and 60 to 70 unruly pre-teens wearing expensive dresses, funny hats, fake bling and brand new white ankle socks... as well as 80-100 middle aged+ adults, some balding, some with bad toupees, most will be professionally coiffed, designer attire galore, lots of REAL bling, and most "tootsed" to the nines. At least 1/3 will be hormonally challenged and some will act stupid while under the influence. Some will not even know where or who they are. Some will complain about the food. Blah Blah Blah.
Please have the courtesy of showing up if you RSVP that you are attending, or you will be billed for $210.00 a plate if you are a no-show. Please RSVP as soon as you get this and not a day before the cut-off date. I can't take the stress.
The gift of choice is either green, or contains a routing and account number. "Off the top of your head" gifts and Gift Cards are a waste of your timeand ours.
Hope you can make it! Lisa and David Miller Dress: Black Tie optional Theme: 007 James Bond
Date Posted: 7/3/2010 11:37 PM ET
Member Since: 4/2/2008 Posts:
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That was great! My husband and I conduct services in the retirement community where we live. The rabbi comes once a month, and I read that when he was there. Absolutely everyone enjoyed it. And the rabbi emailed me to request a copy he could read to his regular congregation!
Date Posted: 12/13/2011 11:24 AM ET
Member Since: 1/29/2007 Posts:
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I am so sorry that I didn't have the 'chutzpah' to send an invitation of this ilk to my three childrens Bar[t] Mizvahs. I bet my kids would have liked it for their children's Bar[t] Mizvah.
Date Posted: 1/5/2013 3:06 PM ET
Member Since: 1/27/2007 Posts:
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Well as someone who is doing an adult bar mitzvah in a few months I am SO going to ask one of my rabbis if he would let me send out a version of it. :)
Last Edited on: 1/5/13 3:07 PM ET - Total times edited: 1
Date Posted: 11/24/2013 7:09 PM ET
Member Since: 1/27/2007 Posts:
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Then I must be a heck of a religious person Harold as my bar mitzvah is now over, I just had a huge kiddush and that was it. No party. One gift from the Reform congregation, two cards, that was it.
