Eva Marie L. (babyjulie) -
Helpful Score: 2
Hmmmmm... I just finished reading some reviews and one in particular is making me think. A few of the reviewers got the impressions that Canedy was glossing over aspects and/or romanticizing other aspects - I didn't get that impression at all. The book isn't all great (IMO) but that I did not come away with.
I think I'd like Canedy if I met her in person, she seems very well adjusted, very well in tune with herself.
I, like other reviewers, went into this thinking it would be Charles' words to his son. I, like another reviewer, wasn't sure if that was "appropriate" or not but as it's not my choice to make, and I found it intriguing, I continued on. As has been said, this isn't the actual journal Charles wrote for Jordan. There are tidbits , a good number, included at certain points in Dana's story. I think where and which Dana chose to include fit very well and that could have made the book go downhill fast if it didn't mesh well with the story.
The pictures are outstanding. The very first picture, before the story even starts, a faded picture of Charles holding a baby Jordan is heartbreaking and uplifting at the very same time.
I didn't like how, after Charles died, Dana questioned the facts surrounding his death. Let me explain myself here. I'd have also wanted to know and I'd have done some asking on my own. That wasn't the journalist in her, that was her love. But she went, IMO, a few steps too far. I wouldn't have, for instance, questioned his motives in going out on that last convoy. The book shows time and again how dedicated Charles was to his soldiers and the military. (If only all of us were so dedicated to each other and America.)
There were a few parts, bringing up two different aspects, that bothered me. One was the sexual parts. I understand that this was probably done for the public and not for Jordan (I hope) but isn't he going to read this? Quite possibly in its entirety? That bothered me and I definitely want to state that she in no way went "over the line"really but hey, parents + sex = icky. It's just not something I'd have ever touched on, not like she did in this book. Does her son, even as a grown man, need to know that she "knew how to touch him when she wanted to quicken their lovemaking". I feel a little bad saying this but.... gross. So that bothered me.
Race. It's always race right? Dana and Charles both seemed very non-judgemental but a few times race came up where I felt it shouldn't have. In the beginning of the book she writes that "so many women, especially black women, longed for the affections of an honorable man". Okay. Well I wasn't aware that race had to come into play here. White women don't long for this? Mexican women? Russian women? WHY specify that black women long for this? Why not just women? I'd like to ask her that.
In the middle of the book she writes about her birthing classes which she attended with a friend of hers because of Charles being in Iraq. She wouldn't have minded the other women thinking she was lesbian because she didn't want them to think she was "just another pregnant black woman without a man". Wow. How callous. White women don't get pregnant without a man? Newsflash - they do. ALL women do. Another needless race specification and one that showed her insecurities. So much so that she actually stood up to announce the why of his absence.
"So many black kids grow up without fathers". Am I supposed to feel more for the black kids? Because white kids grow up without fathers as well. As do kids of any race. Just as kids, black, white and every race in between can grow up with a mother or any other family member. What a stupid utterance and from a woman so obviously intelligent.
Dana took offense to the ways the military handled Charles' death benefits. Jordan was born out of wedlock. There are no if, ands, or buts about it. Don't be mad about it. It's nothing personal against you. That's the way it is. Yet she considered herself being treated like "some bimbo with a baby out to get her dead man's money". Well, umm, you weren't married. Hence you not being approached with a flag at the cemetary (another percieved slight).
That's about it for what I didn't like. I liked a lot honestly. I love memoirs, the more personal the better. I loved reading all the little details that only a memoir lover can appreciate. I feel like I knew Charles in a way and through this, Dana and Jordan as well.
It was very hard to read about how he died. Very hard. Very hard to imagine him, from his pictures, lying on that Iraqi road, bleeding and in shock, with a crushed chest cavity, dying. For his country. One month before coming home.
I wish Dana Canedy and Jordan all the luck in the world, they deserve it. Dana was lucky to know love with Charles, because I have no doubt, after reading their words, that theirs was true love.
I think I'd like Canedy if I met her in person, she seems very well adjusted, very well in tune with herself.
I, like other reviewers, went into this thinking it would be Charles' words to his son. I, like another reviewer, wasn't sure if that was "appropriate" or not but as it's not my choice to make, and I found it intriguing, I continued on. As has been said, this isn't the actual journal Charles wrote for Jordan. There are tidbits , a good number, included at certain points in Dana's story. I think where and which Dana chose to include fit very well and that could have made the book go downhill fast if it didn't mesh well with the story.
The pictures are outstanding. The very first picture, before the story even starts, a faded picture of Charles holding a baby Jordan is heartbreaking and uplifting at the very same time.
I didn't like how, after Charles died, Dana questioned the facts surrounding his death. Let me explain myself here. I'd have also wanted to know and I'd have done some asking on my own. That wasn't the journalist in her, that was her love. But she went, IMO, a few steps too far. I wouldn't have, for instance, questioned his motives in going out on that last convoy. The book shows time and again how dedicated Charles was to his soldiers and the military. (If only all of us were so dedicated to each other and America.)
There were a few parts, bringing up two different aspects, that bothered me. One was the sexual parts. I understand that this was probably done for the public and not for Jordan (I hope) but isn't he going to read this? Quite possibly in its entirety? That bothered me and I definitely want to state that she in no way went "over the line"really but hey, parents + sex = icky. It's just not something I'd have ever touched on, not like she did in this book. Does her son, even as a grown man, need to know that she "knew how to touch him when she wanted to quicken their lovemaking". I feel a little bad saying this but.... gross. So that bothered me.
Race. It's always race right? Dana and Charles both seemed very non-judgemental but a few times race came up where I felt it shouldn't have. In the beginning of the book she writes that "so many women, especially black women, longed for the affections of an honorable man". Okay. Well I wasn't aware that race had to come into play here. White women don't long for this? Mexican women? Russian women? WHY specify that black women long for this? Why not just women? I'd like to ask her that.
In the middle of the book she writes about her birthing classes which she attended with a friend of hers because of Charles being in Iraq. She wouldn't have minded the other women thinking she was lesbian because she didn't want them to think she was "just another pregnant black woman without a man". Wow. How callous. White women don't get pregnant without a man? Newsflash - they do. ALL women do. Another needless race specification and one that showed her insecurities. So much so that she actually stood up to announce the why of his absence.
"So many black kids grow up without fathers". Am I supposed to feel more for the black kids? Because white kids grow up without fathers as well. As do kids of any race. Just as kids, black, white and every race in between can grow up with a mother or any other family member. What a stupid utterance and from a woman so obviously intelligent.
Dana took offense to the ways the military handled Charles' death benefits. Jordan was born out of wedlock. There are no if, ands, or buts about it. Don't be mad about it. It's nothing personal against you. That's the way it is. Yet she considered herself being treated like "some bimbo with a baby out to get her dead man's money". Well, umm, you weren't married. Hence you not being approached with a flag at the cemetary (another percieved slight).
That's about it for what I didn't like. I liked a lot honestly. I love memoirs, the more personal the better. I loved reading all the little details that only a memoir lover can appreciate. I feel like I knew Charles in a way and through this, Dana and Jordan as well.
It was very hard to read about how he died. Very hard. Very hard to imagine him, from his pictures, lying on that Iraqi road, bleeding and in shock, with a crushed chest cavity, dying. For his country. One month before coming home.
I wish Dana Canedy and Jordan all the luck in the world, they deserve it. Dana was lucky to know love with Charles, because I have no doubt, after reading their words, that theirs was true love.
Helpful Score: 1
I laughed. I cried. I loved it. Very touching and honest. Sometimes a little too honest in terms of when the writer describes "making love" and giving herself to her man. But mostly I loved it.
