been struggling with something for a long time. faith in God is hard. I know I'm supposed to trust even though I don't like the outcome, but in this case a "no" from Him would have torn my family apart. so still i'm supposed to trust. i felt terrible not having the faith. finally got his answer, but I had to have a doctor confirm it. she did, but I still have doubts. why? I got teh answer I wanted, but feel so underwhelmed. i don't get it. it was a YES. what the heck is my problem. i wondered one day if that was all a good thing. Satan only attacks the ones he's worried about. so maybe my faith IS stronger than I thing, if the Devil himself is bothering with me. i don't know. but I had to publicly Praise God for the answer.

I don't care if you don't like God. Pleae don't slam my post. This is not intended as a stupid religious fight. just a promise kept.

I am reading Derek Prince's "Secrets of a Prayer Warrior".  It answers every question you asked.  I highly recommend it.  I look at prayer from a whole different angle now. 

Chiv---  sometimes I wonder if I'm NOT faithful enough because I'm not that challenged with suffering in my life right now.  I have plenty to pray for among family members and church members, but don't feel 'Ole Nick' breathing down my neck so think he must not think I'm much of a threat to his evil goals.